I was more carefree with my life at this time last year, but thought I was being careless.
I was trying real hard at this time last year, but you can’t prevent self-sabotage.
I was making plans and decisions at this time last year, but now I can’t remember how important they were.
I was able to take it easier at this time last year, but easy is easy to take.
Things came easier at this time last year, but easy come easy… come.
I was more proud at this time last year, but I had reason to be.
I was more desperate at this time last year, but I had things to be desperate about.
I was in love at this time last year, but didn’t know it.

I know I won’t truly be great untill everybody is talking about how great I used to be.

I went to see Mates Of State (have a listen) again last night. They made a quick stop at the Larimer Lounge on there way to Houston to record. It was another incredible show. This show had the same great interaction with each other and the crowd as previous show I’ve seen. The set was kinda short and consisted of only about 10 or so songs, around half of them being new and they didn’t play an encore. But there was only about 40 or so people their so it was real intimate and had a friendly party vibe. I got their a little early cause I knew the venue was small. I sat at the bar and chatted up (or should I say was chatted up by) a girl who knew the bar tender. We hit it off pretty well and danced through the set. We may get together again next week. I didn’t get home till late late late though and could barely keep my eyes open today. It was totally worth the ten bucks for the ticket, hell I would have paid twenty, but sometimes I’m an idiot. Hopefully tonight I’ll get a good nights rest.
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Radcliffes List of the 100 best novels

1. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
2. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
3. The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
4. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
5. The Color Purple by Alice Walker
6. Ulysses by James Joyce
7. Beloved by Toni Morrison
8. The Lord of the Flies by William Golding
9. 1984 by George Orwell
10. The Sound and the Fury by William Faulkner
11. Lolita by Vladmir Nabokov
12. Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck
13. Charlotte’s Web by E.B. White
14. A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce
15. Catch-22 by Joseph Heller
16. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
17. Animal Farm by George Orwell
18. The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway
19. As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner
20. A Farewell to Arms by Ernest Hemingway
21. Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad
22. Winnie-the-Pooh by A.A. Milne
23. Their Eyes are Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston
24. Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison
25. Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison
26. Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell
27. Native Son by Richard Wright
28. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey
29. Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
30. For Whom the Bell Tolls by Ernest Hemingway
31. On the Road by Jack Kerouac
32. The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway
33. The Call of the Wild by Jack London
34. To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf
35. Portrait of a Lady by Henry James
36. Go Tell it on the Mountain by James Baldwin
37. The World According to Garp by John Irving
38. All the King’s Men by Robert Penn Warren
39. A Room with a View by E.M. Forster
40. The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien
41. Schindler’s List by Thomas Keneally
42. The Age of Innocence by Edith Wharton
43. The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand
44. Finnegans Wake by James Joyce
45. The Jungle by Upton Sinclair
46. Mrs. Dalloway by Virginia Woolf
47. The Wonderful Wizard of Oz by L. Frank Baum
48. Lady Chatterley’s Lover by D.H. Lawrence
49. A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess
50. The Awakening by Kate Chopin
51. My Antonia by Willa Cather
52. Howards End by E.M. Forster
53. In Cold Blood by Truman Capote
54. Franny and Zooey by J.D. Salinger
55. The Satanic Verses by Salman Rushdie
56. Jazz by Toni Morrison
57. Sophie’s Choice by William Styron
58. Absalom, Absalom! by William Faulkner
59. A Passage to India by E.M. Forster
60. Ethan Frome by Edith Wharton
61. A Good Man Is Hard to Find by Flannery O’Connor
62. Tender Is the Night by F. Scott Fitzgerald
63. Orlando by Virginia Woolf
64. Sons and Lovers by D.H. Lawrence
65. Bonfire of the Vanities by Tom Wolfe
66. Cat’s Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut
67. A Separate Peace by John Knowles
68. Light in August by William Faulkner
69. The Wings of the Dove by Henry James
70. Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe
71. Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier
72. A Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams
73. Naked Lunch by William S. Burroughs
74. Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh
75. Women in Love by D.H. Lawrence
76. Look Homeward, Angel by Thomas Wolfe
77. In Our Time by Ernest Hemingway
78. The Autobiography of Alice B. Tokias by Gertrude Stein
79. The Maltese Falcon by Dashiell Hammett
80. The Naked and the Dead by Norman Mailer
81. Wide Sargasso Sea by Jean Rhys
82. White Noise by Don DeLillo
83. O Pioneers! by Willa Cather
84. Tropic of Cancer by Henry Miller
85. The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells
86. Lord Jim by Joseph Conrad
87. The Bostonians by Henry James
88. An American Tragedy by Theodore Dreiser
89. Death Comes for the Archbishop by Willa Cather
90. The Wind in the Willows by Kenneth Grahame
91. This Side of Paradise by F. Scott Fitzgerald
92. Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand
93. The French Lieutenant’s Woman by John Fowles
94. Babbitt by Sinclair Lewis
95. Kim by Rudyard Kipling
96. The Beautiful and the Damned by F. Scott Fitzgerald
97. Rabbit, Run by John Updike
98. Where Angels Fear to Tread by E.M. Forster
99. Main Street by Sinclair Lewis
100. Midnight’s Children by Salman Rushdie
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Don’t worry. You’re much cooler than I am. I’m sure your three-day weekend was way more eventful and fun than mine was.
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Last night I attended a really fun charity event downtown. A group of about ten of us in my office formed a chair-hockey team and entered as a sponser/team in the tournament. The benefit was for The Bridge Project. The tournament was located on the vacant, 27th floor, of a high-rise downtown. Two “rinks” were constructed with cube-wall partitions. The floors of these rinks were covered in particleboard.

The only two rules were: each player had to remain seated in their office chair during the entire game and no high sticking (one guy lost a tooth within the first 5 minutes of the tournament). Other than that it was absolute chaos for 5 minutes when the period ended. It was tons of fun. Not to mention all the free food and beer or wine that we wanted.

We ended up placing 3rd out of the 16 teams and were awarded with cheesy little metals and a free massage. I just got done with the massage and it was incredible. It was in one of those bizarre chair things (you know where you place your face in that weird cushioned toilet seat like apparatus) not a table massage, but I’ve never had a professional massage before and it felt great. I’m hoping that it helps boost my immune system and helps get rid of this cold I have.

More pictures below.
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I’m still feeling sick. Now I’m starting to get congested but the fever has passed. The mornings are tuff, but after I’ve been up for a while I start to feel better. Somebody in our office has recently acquired an account with Otis Spunkmeyer. With the account Otis provided us with an industrial sized cookie baker and a freezer (literally the entire freezer is full) of cookie dough. Know every afternoon the whole office smells like a chocolate chip cookie factory.

But I can’t keep away from the uncooked dough.

I’m not normally a huge fan of sweets. I hate cake, not a big fan of chocolate (I hate that flemmy film that [particularly cheap] chocolate leaves in my throat), will only eat hard candy on rare occasions. I have a pantry full of whoppers, candy corns, and oreos. And it will probably stay that way because I won’t eat them. But there are certain things that make my mouth water. I really enjoy ice cream, coke, whipped cream (from the aerosol canister), orange juice concentrate, mousse, and cookie dough.

I’ve come in every morning for the last two weeks and have eaten a chunk of cookie dough the size of two ping-pong balls. And then, sometimes, I have another chunk in the afternoon. This couldn’t be good for me, but I so seldom indulge in sugary sweet goodness that it feels justified. And it tastes ooooohhhhh-so-gooood!

I started to feel a little ill on Sunday night. By the time I woke up yesterday I was feeling like a bucket of shit. I came in to work and finished a few things that had to get done. Then in a fever fueled delirium, I started sending out e-mails to people I haven’t wanted to talk to, or haven’t wanted to talk to me, in a long time. I’m not really sure why I sent them. I’ve got only friendly and welcoming (although surprised) responses back. But I don’t think that was what I was really after. I’m not sure what I was expecting. I must get some sleep. I’m still sick and I want my energy back. My fever has subsided but my throat is sore, and my bones ache, and I don’t want to do anything more stupid than I have already. It’s not a big deal. I need rest.

I had a nice weekend. On friday I went to an old haunt, The Bank. I’m surprised the bar tender their remembered me, as it had been almost a year since I had been there. Had a few beers then came home.

I slept in on Saturday. At around noon I met my dad and my brother at Coors Field to watch the Rockies play the Expos. The rockies lost, but I got to introduce my brother to the infamous Rockie Dog (a foot long hotdog with fresh onions, grilled onions, grilled red peppers, grilled green peppers, sourkraut, and mustard). Only three places in the nation serve the Rockie Dog, and they all happen to be within 100 yards of each other. After the game me and my brother went over to my mom’s to celebrate mothers day (we were both in Vegas last weekend). We watched Piñero. It was just “ok”. I’d only recommend it to the right people. The chronology was difficult to follow. I don’t think I would have like it had it not been biographical.

I got up early on Sunday morning and spent the morning at the coffee shop reading. The I hopped on my bike and went tooling around town. I went to Revoluciones to check out the showing of Amy Flomberg’s work. It was all really good, I particularly liked the larger brighter pieces. Sherry Hern also had work there that was pretty good. I also spent some time at Denver Public Library and riding around the park.

The night before last I went over to my brothers to bbq. We had brauts&kraut, corn-on-the-cob, baked potatoes, and sunshine wheat. We sat on his back porch, listened to tunes, smoked cigarettes and told each other our Vegas stories. The weather was perfect. It was a beautiful evening. I didn’t want it to end.

I wanted last night to end as quickly as possible. I was lazy and stayed on the couch till late in the evening when all of a sudden I was overcome with some sort of weird nervous energy.
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After a very prolonged and heart-pounding week, the suspense is finally over. The much awaited results for the very ballyhooed cholesteral contest have finally arrived.

Before we get to the results, I would like to make a few thank-yous. First to my doctor, without whom the blood-work would never have been processed. I would also like to thank all the doctors who were involved in the process of discovering cholesterol and thus providing us with one more thing to worry about (not to mention discovering one more thing that can kill us). I can’t forget to thank my parents for providing me with the blood, and eggs for providing me with the cholesterol. Oh yeah, I’d also like to thank Jesus because somehow it seems necessary.

The contestants and their respective guesses follow:

Chevy : 125

The processing of the entries was long and arduous but a definite winner was established. Thanks to everyone who participated. This contest was a raging success and the winner will be thusly awarded. So without further ado, here are the results:
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#

We won again at ultimate last night but it was an ugly match. The opposing team had a three point lead in the beginning, but after we moved ahead, the game got really physical and there were lots of fouls called. One guy actually punched me in the back as he ran by me after I scored. I just berated him till he apologized a couple of times in front of my teammates. They never let their girls handle the disk. There was no rhyme at the end. It was a good competitive game but the it lacked in sportsmanship. I also ended up yelling at some lady who let her toddler wander on the field during our game. She complained that we should have marked the field better (we play on soccer fields that are marked off with cones). I told her she should watch her baby closer and be a better role model for her children. We get no respect. Out with the negativity.

I took the day off of work on Friday. I woke up early did a load of laundry, washed the dishes (I have to do them by hand), and picked up my apartment. Five hours later I was already up $100 on the blackjack tables.

About twelve of us headed out to Las Vegas, Nevada for a double bachelor party over the weekend. My brother and about ten of his friends were going out there for a bachelor party too. Needless to say, the plane trip was pretty rowdy and we can be fairly sure we annoyed everyone that we hadn’t infected with our contagious raucousness. We were able to fanaggle a stretch limo from the airport to the hotel. After checking in, we proceeded to gamble and drink free drinks well into the evening. The evening was a blur of white russians, beam & cokes, e, casino hopping, poker rooms and lounge acts. It was an exceptionally fun and strange night indeed. Hah, I know that one didn’t slip by you, it’s a special treat I only indulge in a couple times a year or so. The Lama had an episode in the Plaza poker room but recovered soon after. We spent a lot of time at quarter roulette and the bar afterward. This is around my fifth time to Vegas and I’m still amazed by its absurdity and ridiculousness. It’s phoniness never ceases to entertain me. I refuse to spend more than three nights there.

Slept in late on Saturday. Spent some time poolside and ogled all of the bikinis and curves. Went to a classic Vegas style buffet breakfast/lunch. Took a nap. And then started the whole process over again. This time we headed out of downtown and went to Cheetahs (don’t worry, it’s safe) for some “adult entertainment”. After that, it was off to the strip for more drinks and casino hopping.

Sunday morning came real quick. Everyone had a great time. We checked out of the casino and six hours later I was back in my apartment with the Vegas Funk - hungover, broke and horny. The weekend was really just a blur. But it was damn worth it.

It might be true, that they are really out there. Those clouds. Pearly luminescent love. Wisps and shiny cotton wads of earth’s most natural of resources. Lightly skimming and somtimes envoloping. They float around the world wraping around unsuspecting you’s and me’s. Most of us know they are out there only because we’ve been wraped up in them before. When you are wraped up with love it is a warm lustrous fog. And love, like normal clouds, look solid and seperate and of their own entity from the outside or from a distance. But when you get near one, you learn it has no defined boundries and that it’s an intangible, wonderful and refreshing fog. And when its thick you can’t see a thing. It might be true, that they are really out there. Those clouds.

People don’t meet because they both wanted to rent the only copy of Waiting For Guffman last Tuesday, or because your friends sister has a friend who is new in town, or because the cute girl in the black spaghetti strap top at the party last year couldn’t stop smiling because she noticed that you couldn’t stop staring. Sometimes people just meet, and sometimes they just happen to meet in a love cloud. It might be true, that they are really out there. Those clouds. And some people are lucky enough to bump into each other in their mist and swirl.

When and where we fall in love only seems random because the movement of love is just as sporadic as that of normal clouds. Right now there is one at the South Kensington stop of the Cirle Line, another thick cloud is near a small lake at Minnehetti sports camp in West Virginia, and there are wisps on the fifteenth floor of Mutual of Omaha building in Salt Lake City. It might be true, that they are really out there. Those clouds. And we unknowingly walk into their fog. And we don’t fall in love with each other, we just fall in love.

I used to think my old doctor was the greatest. Well she still is, as far as I know. But she won’t be my doctor anymore. But that is only cause she quit internal medicine and is now working with the elderly. So after she quit, I was reassigned a new doctor. And this is one of the major downfalls that I run into with HMO’s. They just assign you somebody. You have no idea who they are, and that can be a little scary when this is a person you are going to be discussing some very intimate details of your life and body with. And I really liked my old doctor. She took her time, explained things, even if they weren’t important. She thought of good questions and was always willing to answer mine. I even recommended her to a couple of friends who also found her to be a wonderful doctor.

But today I went to go see my new “assigned” doctor for my yearly check up. And I have to say, he was great. He never rushed. He answered all my stupid questions (why do you guys always check my involuntary reflexes by tapping my knee with that rubber mallet? I mean if I can move voluntarily why check them?) And asked a lot of questions himself. So, I think I may have lucked out.
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