The Stench
It had been a long time since I had done my dishes. I tackled the project last night but it sucked because the smell was absolutely horrendous. I actually gagged a little at first. Then I lit some incense in the kitchen just to drown out whatever it was that smelt like dogshit in my sink. Well everything is all scrubbed and cleaned and sparkling now but it was awfully trying at first.
One time, when I was living with Oats, there was a stink that was coming from the kitchen. We couldn’t quite place where the smell was coming from. It seemed to be emanating from somewhere near the sink but it would waft and gasp throughout the kitchen making it’s source hard to place. So naturally we thought it must be from the wastebasket we kept under the sink. I immediately took the trash out to the dumpster, despite the fact that the basket was only half full. Sometimes it only takes one foul item to make a completely offensive statement. The next day the stench had returned. After a sniffing session that still resulted in no known source, Oats went about completely cleaning the kitchen. This kept the kitchen area smelling of sterile-sweet citrus 409 for a couple of days. But after that, the malodorous funk was back to haunt us with it’s rancid vapor. We decided that the smell must be emanating from the garbage disposal unit. A couple days later, after running a swimming pool worth of water and soap down the drain, Oats went and bought a new disposal unit. After the unit was installed, we had suspected we were in the clear. Our suspicions were inaccurate and faulty. The odor did not want to leave. Just when Oats was starting to panic that her kitchen was going to be forever unusable, it was discovered that putrid fetor was issuing forth from an African Violet that I had place by the flour and sugar jars. I was humiliated and feeling guilty that I had let my plant cause all of this havoc. I’m not sure why this plant had stunk so violently. Possibly it had some sort of root rot or something. I’ll never be sure. But I do know, from then on I have kept all my African Violets healthy and happy. And when Oats demurely lets a little flatulence slip on by, I’ll thoughtfully let her place full blame on my leafy green friends.
1 lotus Says:
That story is totally hilarious. I’ve had that happen a bunch of times as well. I have a bad habit of buying food, and then forgetting about it until it goes bad weeks later. It’s hard to shop for one.
2 jules Says:
Ah yes, “sniffing sessions” We had a smell eminating from beneath the sink in our bathroom at the last house. It came and went a number of times in the two years we lived there but we never did find its source. Maybe there were African Violets growing in the drain.
3 hubs Says:
lotus - yeah, shopping for one is difficult, cooking for one is asinine.
jules - haha. i’ve often thought about ripping off your “some days smell like…” post. who knows maybe i’ll still do it.
4 Lux Says:
The smell of rotting plants… I know it well. My roommate’s fault, mind you, not mine.
5 chevy Says:
why oats?
6 Secret Agent Jo Says:
We had that happen once.. a sniffing session that lasted for three days until we called the gas man. We thought it was our gas leaking. Turned out a rat had crawled in our wall and died. aack!
7 Makenna Says:
And I was all for that cup of coffee…
8 hubs Says:
chevy - it’s just a nickname.
jo - yuck. dead rats have to be 10x stinkier than plants.
makenna - i swear my coffee doesn’t sink!
9 Allison Says:
Ha- I haven’t been up on my rounds lately, so at the risk of you saying it’s been up for a month- your layout looks fab! This story is hilarious- actually, I’m feeling a lot of what you’re writing these days- but I had a funky smell in the fridge the last week. Even after I took everything out, I couldn’t find the source. It even went over into the freezer! Finally pulled out the drawers and found a pool of stanky beef juices fermenting in the bottom of the thing. It looked like the cow was actually slaughtered IN the fridge. Roomie is just a little slovenly. After seeing that, though, I guess he feels bad- he actually vaccuumed!