Denver Is Drunk. Really, Really Drunk

Denver makes the nasty list again, and I’m not sure I should be proud or ashamed (mostly ashamed). That is to say – I love that Denver knows how to party, I hate that we can’t do it responsibly.

Men’s Health magazine graded each state on the deadliness of it’s drunkards and Denver ranked first. The listing took into account death rates due to alcoholic liver disease, how many citizens regularly down five or more drinks in a sitting (CDC), drunk-driving arrests (FBI), the percentage of fatal accidents involving intoxicated motorists (U.S. Department of Transportation). and the MADD report card of state efforts to cut down on excessive drinking. This is how the report card shook out:
100 Denver, CO – F
99 Anchorage, AK – F
98 Colorado Springs, CO – F
97 Omaha, NE – F
96 Fargo, ND – F
95 San Antonio, TX – F
94 Austin, TX – F
93 Fresno, CA – F
92 Lubbock, TX – F
91 Milwaukee, WI – F
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Day By Day Birthday Week Review

My birthday week (last week) was so full of kickass it’s hard to comprehend.

It started out last Friday by heading over to a friends for drinks and then going to the Murray Farm Massacre. I haven’t been to a haunted house since I was a child but The haunted house was certainly frightening and well designed. I’m no stranger to corn mazes though, and this one pretty much sucked – way too easy (even at night) and not all that freaky.

Haunted School Bus

Saturday we threw a raging halloween/costume party at our house. G made seven crockpots worth of homemade, slow-cook, goodness. The were black lights, and costumes, and spooky sounds to boot. The night finished with a big ole dance party that devolved into everyone dancing on the furniture. This resulted in one broken kitchen chair, a burning wig in a chandelier, snack carrots ending up in mysterious places, and one skull nearly cracked open. It was all worth.

Sunday mostly involved laying on the couch and recovering from Saturday’s debauchery.

On Tuesday we got the new Tivo hooked up. This thing is absolutely brilliant. It has already started changing the way I watch TV and I haven’t watch a commercial in over a week. Not to mention I have all kinds of great movies lined up that I’ve been waiting to see.

For my birthday, G and I hand bacon cheeseburgers (from my very favorite hamburger shack down the street from us) and champagne for dinner. I am also now a real art owner. G gave me a signed and numbered Audrey Kawasaki print called “Nest Hair”. Number 55 of a limited print of 100. I’m in love with it. It’s one of the coolest gifts I have received in a long time.

Nest Hair

Thursday we met my Dad, his wife, my bro, and pandy out for a sushi dinner. Johnny Holly’s has great sushi and fantastic service without the pretentiousness. If you are ever thinking about going to the sushi den, drive ten blocks further south and go to Johnny Holly’s instead. You’ll be glad. If you are hankering for any sort of asian food that isn’t on the menu, just ask for it, and the kitchen will fix it up for you.

Thanks to everyone for making my week be so tremendous.

Birthday Bash

Lots of fun birthday stuff over the past couple of weeks.

The last week in September was the perfect time to go to Elitches. Everybody thinks it’s closed because it only runs on the weekends and none of their Halloween advertising has started yet. Tickets are also extra cheap if you buy them at Safweay. A bunch of us rode roller coasters for five hours in a effort to reclaim our youth. We rode nothing but roller coasters. We rode every single one of them, and most of them twice. We never stood in line for longer than three minutes and always had our choice of carts. I prefer the back. Ride stats are after the jump. Afterwards we hit up Brothers Bar for some birthday drinks and such.

Coaster Complexity

Last weekend I was able to round up a bunch of free tickets to Comedy Works to see Dov Davidoff (youtube link) for another birthday party. He was really funny. His demeanor was a little hard to get used to. He sort of reminded me of my brother with a few cocktails in him. Very funny. And a great evening overall.
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Jacksonville, Funida

It has been nearly three weeks and I never wrote about my trip to Florida. Well, about three weeks ago I went to Florida. For a short week. To celebrate my mothers 60th birthday. This is the first time I had been out there since my mother moved there about a-year-and-a-half ago. It was a great trip that mostly involved tons and tons of beach time. Mostly large wave beach time that was perfect for body surfing and boogie boarding in. We had a great sushi dinner for my mom’s birthday. There was tons of drinking going on all weekend, and plenty of fun was had by all. More fun than I am aloud to talk about on this blog. Which also made things very interesting. Downers included the loss of my wallet and an unexpected overnight stay in a very dumpy hotel in Atlanta. But this is how I roll.

BIG Candle

Old Man And The Sea

Beach

Surfs Up

Delayed

Second Annual Beer Olympics: Aquatic Version

Second Annual Beer Olympics: Aquatic Version

Second Annual Beer Olympics: Aquatic Version

It’s a week late but I thought I’d share a little about my Independence Day holiday. I woke up early and headed over to Bear’s house for the 4th of July Pool Party And 2nd Annual Beer Olympics: Aquatic Version. Events included blind mans beer, swim-chug-pull, beer tread. G and I came in second place thanks mainly to G’s ability to tread water for 55 minutes with a beer in one hand. She said she could have gone longer but frankly everybody was getting bored (and a little too drunk) with watching her.

Afterward we swung over to my brothers for some pizza and tacos from “Tacoss” taquería (no website, no yellow pages address, no citysearch, located here and more beer. We picked up Pandy and headed back to the pool party where many pool games were played, long floats were floated and cold beers were drankeded. The rest of the evening consisted of a Sopranos marathon. Good times indeed.

Other things that have been occupying my time include:

  • A birthday party at Sushi Basho
  • A birthday party at Carmines On Penn
  • Tubing down the Platte
  • Car troubles
  • Baseball games
  • Wake boarding
  • Renewed Vows
  • Movies
  • Other stuff
  • Five Pounds Of Crawfish, A Six Pack Of Beer

    Crawfish Boil :: Denver
    Since we now have a coon-ass in the family, Mardi Gras and its associated holiday’s, have become much more important. At least the party part of them has. Yesterday’s Fat Tuesday was no different (though my sister-inlaw wasn’t involved at all). Me and G headed over to Lincoln’s Raodhouse (home of the meat loaf cheeseburger and pot roast burrito), or as it is affectionately called during Mardi Gras: Poirrier’s Cajun Cafe, for their annual crawfish boil. How do you say it Down South? Crawfish or Crayfish? We called them crawdads growing up. Anyway, we settled up to five pounds of crawfish, a six pack of beer, a roll of paper towels, and several beaded necklaces.

    The place got pretty crowded and the kitchen was churning out bucket after bucket of crawfish as fast as it could and it wasn’t close to keeping up with demand. By the time the washboard band that was crammed in the corner started blaring their zydofied (I think I just invented a word) zz top music, the place was standing room only. The dancing began but we left before the place it was in full fervor, which, given the clientele in this place, was probably a good idea. I don’t care to imagine the place with beads, beer bottles, and boobs flying around.