It Was My Fault

Just some quick updates cause I don’t feel like writing much.

We lost our first game of ultimate last night. It was my fault. I wasn’t playing tight enough D. The guy I was covering scored the winning point. Oh well.

I had lunch with Sabrina today. We went to my favorite mexican restaurant: La Fiesta. I like going there to show off cause I’m kind of a regular. I know some of the wait staff and they have a hubs burrito (super burrito, beef & been, extra cheese, green chili, no tomato). Mmmmmmmm. Me and Sabrina touched on some issues of our past and such. She still seems a little bitter toward me and I know I’m still a little bitter towards her. And you can tell we both have some things we want to say but are not sure how. But, at the same time, it’s really nice being able to hang out together.
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Those Clouds

It might be true, that they are really out there. Those clouds. Pearly luminescent love. Wisps and shiny cotton wads of earth’s most natural of resources. Lightly skimming and sometimes enveloping. They float around the world wrapping around unsuspecting you’s and me’s. Most of us know they are out there only because we’ve been wrapped up in them before. When you are wrapped up with love it is a warm lustrous fog. And love, like normal clouds, look solid and separate and of their own entity from the outside or from a distance. But when you get near one, you learn it has no defined boundaries and that it’s an intangible, wonderful and refreshing fog. And when its thick you can’t see a thing. It might be true, that they are really out there. Those clouds.

People don’t meet because they both wanted to rent the only copy of Waiting For Guffman last Tuesday, or because your friend’s sister has a friend who is new in town, or because the cute girl in the black spaghetti strap top at the party last year couldn’t stop smiling because she noticed that you couldn’t stop staring. Sometimes people just meet, and sometimes they just happen to meet in a love cloud. It might be true, that they are really out there. Those clouds. And some people are lucky enough to bump into each other in their mist and swirl.

When and where we fall in love only seems random because the movement of love is just as sporadic as that of normal clouds. Right now there is one at the South Kensington stop of the Circe Line, another thick cloud is near a small lake at Minnehetti sports camp in West Virginia, and there are wisps on the fifteenth floor of Mutual of Omaha building in Salt Lake City. It might be true, that they are really out there. Those clouds. And we unknowingly walk into their fog. And we don’t fall in love with each other, we just fall in love.

Fully Charged

You didn’t really expect it. Two weeks ago you shared a bottle of wine at the bar. You exchanged light conversation at first, but after a couple of glasses you both got braver, and gave each other gentle hints as to how you feel. What made you angry. What you miss most. What you want now. Something was accomplished, maybe it was just a little communication. But you both walked away from each other feeling better than you have about yourselves, and one another, for the past couple of months.

“Lets meet for dinner on Thursday, just to catch up and hang out.”
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Mostly Lacked Real Substance

A couple of minutes ago I had my first communication via email with Sabrina in a long while. It was cold, distant, unnecessary and mostly lacked real substance. But still, for some reason, it increased the speed of my heart and turned my stomach a little bit. I’m so tired right now. I got little sleep again last night. Time is going so slow this afternoon. I’m going out to dinner with pops again tonight. I’ve been spending a lot more time with family lately and it’s been really nice. My Mom, Dad and Brother have all been so supportive. I really need them right now too. My brother is inviting me out with him all the time. My mom asks me how I’m doing all the time. My dad calls me every couple of days just to see how things are going for me. A special thanks to my incredible family, I love you.

How To Crack An Egg

I caught Sabrina on AMC last night. It seemed fitting for the times so I stayed up late and watched it all. I miss you Sabrina, wherever you are. This quote from the movie seemed especially appropriate:

Bonjour, mesdames et monsiuers. Yesterday we have learned the correct way how to boil water. Today we will learn the correct way how to crack an egg. Voila! An egg. Now, an egg is not a stone; it is not made of wood, it is a living thing. It has a heart. So when we crack it, we must not torment it. We must be merciful and execute it quickly, like with the guillotine.
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