You know I really haven’t gotten into this whole World Poker Championships and Celebrity Poker crap that has been sweeping the nation lately. Watching people play cards is like watching bowling or golf. It’s just plain boring. I don’t care if it’s Dolly Parton with a queen of hearts hidden in her massive cleavage or Cheech Marin using his “funny” acting skills to bluff his opponent, the celebrities don’t make it any more interesting. I think it would be funny to walk in on somebody playing solitaire on their coffee table while watching one of those celebrity poker tournaments. That would be the personification of pathetic. You’d get to make fun of somebody for a long time if you caught them in that sort of compromising position. Of course, I’ve done much, much more pathetic things than that, I’m just lucky that nobody walked in on me while I was doing them. But that is neither here nor there. Back to my topic. Poker on TV is a fruitless waste when you can actually play poker.
And playing poker, as you may have guessed at this point, is what I did last night. I met the boys over at Uncle Squigley’s. A five dollar buy-in got me pizza, beer, and an evening’s entertainment. We played Texas Hold ‘Em, Omaha, Chase The Bitch, Guts, Whores & Fours, 357, Stacks, Lowball, Juevos, Between The Sheets, and a few other games. I came out thirty bucks ahead, which is actually a pretty amazing feat for me. I’m an admittedly terrible poker player. Or at least that’s what I tell the people I’m playing. You see, like many things in life, it’s all about the bluff.