fake

Unedited Footage Of A Bear (Sponsored by Claridryl)

On the heels of “Too Many Cooks”, comes Adult Swim’s horrifying, disturbing and genius “Unedited Footage Of a Bear”. It begins with candid footage of a bear, as promised in the title. The bear footage is interrupted by a fake infomercial for a side-effect-prone nasal spray called Claridryl. It then rapidly devolves into chaotic violence. It aired for the first time on Adult Swim this week in their 4am infomercial slot. It’s dark, uncomfortable and brilliant.

The video’s “Skip Ad” button will take you to the promotional website for Claridryl. Let the website play all the way through or click the house about 10 times. The video was directed by Alan Resnik of Alan Tutorial fame and Memime fame.

Some side effects effects may may occur. If side effects occur occur please form a second opinion. Your inside affects your outside side effects; Claridryl affects your insides effects on your outside. Please choose sides before consulting Claridryl. Claridryl is not responsible for switched sides, insides or out. What were you thinking? Claridryl is not related to that.

Gravity Is A Mistake

I typically prefer roller coasters over the dizzy, spinney, types of amusement rides. However, the rides being engineered by the Institute For Centrifugal Research (ICR) look like a barrel of fun. But not only is the IRC trying to create good times, they’re attempting to increase the cognitive function of their riders through centrifugal research. While most of their rides are for adults only, Dr. Nick Laslowicz is hoping that the Centrifuge Brain Project will theoretically improve the passenger’s cognitive abilities through “achievements in the realms of brain manipulation, excessive G-Force and prenatal simulations.”

Blueprints for some of the rides developed by the ICR can be found below:

ICR Spheroton

ICR Dandelion

The IRC has lofty goals of having “These machines provide total freedom by cutting all connection from the world you live in – communication, responsibility, weight.” The amusement park rides are said to have created profound experiences “Which in many people in many people resulted in the readjustment of key goals and life aspirations.” However, as you’ll see from the video below these goals have come at a cost.


All images and videos via Till Nowak

More videos and images about the project can be found at the IRC website.

How To Tell If Your Sriracha Is Fake

Over at Eat Drink & Be Merry blogger Dylan James Ho points us out to a bottle of counterfeit Sriracha he found in Little Saigon (Los Angeles). The fake is pretty easy to spot (the blue cap and the unicorn on the front are dead give-a-ways) but it’s obvious it’s produced to deceive the customer. Huy Fong Foods Inc., the original manufacturer of Sriracha, reports that its sauce is often poorly imitated and suggests these four ways to be sure you have the real thing:

1. That taste is not identical to our product.
2. Below the green cap of our bottles, there is a protruding plastic ring, which is the same diameter of the green cap. The counterfeit product’s ring is much smaller.
3. Our product’s batch code consists of two lines printed with a laser etcher, which produces a clear, colorless imprint. The first line states the product/batch code (must start with an H) and the second line states the expiration date. The counterfeit does not have a product/batch code but has an expiration date that may be either be printed in black ink or or hot-stamped resulting in a colorless, blurry imprint.
4. Finally, our bottle has ‘Huy Fong USA’ embossed on the bottom of our bottle. The counterfeit does not.

Fuckin’ Math

If my highschool math text books were more like this I probably would have grasped onto abstract algebra a lot easier – Fuckin’ Concrete Contemporary Abstract Algebra Introduction By First Course Radical Solution Dummies: Dummit, Foote, Hungerford, Shifrin, Gallian, Fraleigh, Beachy, Herstein, Saracino, Artin, Deskins (Paperback), by Nicolas Bourbaki Junior, ISBN 1441451579, 100 pages, published 2009. Here is an excerpt:

For fucking example, the symbols could be fucked as symmetries of a fuck, as the fuck of a switch, as an instruction to a machine fuck, or as a way to fuck a statistical experiment. The fucks could be manipulated using some of the unusual fucks for fuckers. For fucking example, the fucked polynomial 3x²+2x-1 could be fucked to and multiplied by other fucking polynomials without ever having to interpret the fuckbol x as a fucker.

UPDATE: Unfortunately Nicolas Bourbaki Junior’s book has been erased from the Amazon database. It can now be found here or here.

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